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The second book of Randy and Gary: commonly called Insertion

Chapter 6

1Tuning: Eb(Eb,Ab,Db,Gb,Bb,Eb)


2Adolf and his Jewish people came upon Poland. But they did no wish to enter Poland for it was a stupid place and German sausage is better then Polish sausage. 3Then came the Polish army! Oh nos!

4So Adolf said to his General, "Choose for us an army among the man to fight the Polish army. I will stand upon the hill and command the armies."

5Adolf's General hand picked 300 of the finest men to take on the hundreds or thousands Polacks (if you think I spelled "polack" wrong then you are a fucking moron).

6Adolf's army dug in and held back the Polack's for three days. They slaughtered the Polack's and they died by the sword. 7War! huh, yeah. What is it good for? Absolutely nothing! Uh-huh!

8But soon the Polish army broke ranks and all out ran in every direction fighting with each other. His own lines were over run and soon the Polish were advancing on his position.

9Adolf used his mouse and click "Cheat mode." A pop up window appeared before Adolf. "Using cheat mode will change game play. Do you wish to continue?"

10Adolf hit "yes".

11He then click on the cheat menu again and toggled "create tanks."

12Panzer IV tanks started to appear all over the battle field. At first Adolf had the upper hand. He started to destroy the Polish armies. But then unreasonable things started to happen, Archers and Chariots started to destroy his tanks. 13So Adolf toggled cheat mode again and created Howitzer and Riflemen.

14Soon Adolf had the upper hand but not shortly after his men started to die. Then one of Adolf's cities became unhappy and rioted. 15The mayor fled. Adolf had to divert some troops to deal with the mess. Then toggled cheat to build the city a courthouse and a library. 16That usually shuts them up.

17After many hours of playing Adolf's hand started to get tired of going to the cheat menu. So he called upon two generals to move his and to the cheat menu when ever necessary. Soon the sun was below the horizon. 18And his general, Lawn Mowerman mowed down the Polacks with the edge of his mower blade.

19Then the Lord said to Adolf, "Write this down, Ingredients

  • 1 acorn squash (about the size of a large softball), scrubbed on outside and cut into 4ths (unpeeled)
  • 1/2 cup dried white beans
  • 2 stalks celery, chopped
  • 1 cup onion, chopped
  • 3 cloves garlic, minced
  • Vegetable bouillon/broth (dry, enough for 2 cups liquid broth)
  • Pepper
  • Parsleysprigs and carrot curls for garnish


1. Soak beans overnight.
2. Rinse beans and put in large pot with 3 cups water.
3. Add celery, onion, garlic and bouillon, bring to boil and then turn down to low (cover pot).
4. Fill Another large pot with water and bring to a boil.
5. Put the acorn squash in the boiling water and boil for about 10-15 minutes or until a fork poked into The inside feels like poking a well done mashed potato.
6. Remove the squash and set aside to cool.
7. Once the squash is cool enough to handle, scoop out The inside and puree in a blender or food processor.
8. After the squash is pureed, add it to the bean mixture.
9. Finish cooking soup so that an hour has Passed from when the beans started cooking.
10. If the soup is too watery for your taste, cook without the lid on for a while, or puree about a 3rd of the Batch (beans, onions, celery, garlic and all) and then add the pureed ingredients back to the original batch.
11. Season to taste with pepper.
12. Garnish with a Sprig of parsley and a carrot curl."

20Adolf wrote down the recipe. He now ruled over the Polish.

21Day and night Adolf sat upon his throne. The people of Jew and Poland came before Adolf with all their problems for him to solve. Day and night Adolf solved the problems of every man and woman. For months he served the people. 22Then on the third week of the tenth month Adolf stood and said, "Take heed, I need a vacation in I'm going to Hawaii."    StumbleUpon Toolbar

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